Eniola
3 min readApr 10, 2021

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THE UNITED TWEEPS OF TWITTER.

Welcome to the united tweeps of twitter. A country with people of diverse tribes, religion and ideologies, even more, welcome to this state filled with a people of unsolicited and wavy opinions.

In here we’ve got lots of groups of people, in here, it Is peace, drama, peace, drama, exactly in that order. In here, it’s love for breakfast, drama for lunch and violence for dinner. Maybe we do love ourselves in this state, but it almost feels like a fair-weathered love. The love is subtle, but the hate and negativity be so loud, one doesn’t need ears to hear it.

We have a few popular tribes in this state, we’ve got the feminist's tribe, we’ve got the relationship tribe, we’ve got the singles tribe, one must not forget the religious tribe, there’s certainly the extremist's tribe, the toxic stan tribe, the atheist tribe. We’ve got lots of tribes here. One could spend the whole day listing them.

Well on today’s case file in the high court of twitter, the case is about Mr Xavier vs the united tweeps of twitter. with that being said, in here, everyone has an opinion—unsolicited opinions, the whole country stands as the court room. But before that, there’s a subtle beef between the relationship tribe and the singles tribe. The singles tribe have their motto as “God when”, and on the other end, the relationship tribe have their motto as “I found my best friend”. The case is still in court right now, as the singles tribe sued the relationship tribe for intimidation.

The former are getting sick of being intimidated with the latter’s love lives and want them to go form a country of theirs. We are still on the case and are waiting to see the outcome of it.

Back to Xavier’s case. He was accused of body shaming and emotionally abusing his girlfriend, well, “ex”. She brought the case to the high court of twitter, with raging judges and assistant judges ready to condemn Xavier, without proof.

The case lasted for two days, with the unsolicited opinions of tweeps flying out like bees that have just been freed from their hives. One hundred unsolicited opinions of tweeps per minute with 85% of them condemning Xavier. The “judges” came to a conclusion that Xavier was guilty of the charges his ex- girlfriend brought, he was charged to a life sentence as an abuser, he was also sentenced to a rapid loss of followers and the loss of his job.

Meanwhile, there’s also an issue between the atheist and the religious tribe, but the case is moving slower than a baby trying to crawl, so the united tweeps of twitter have concluded that we trash the case and let everyone flow with whatever beliefs they have.

Luckily, Xavier was able to find proof to counter the accusations his ex-girlfriend made against him, well the judges of twitter went mute, the 85% of the tweeps who condemned Xavier also went silent. And as the motto of this amazing country states; “violence at its peak” was the order of the day for the next 24 hours. By that time, Xavier had already tried committing suicide because he couldn’t take all the humiliation, luckily his guardian angel was working full time that day. Yes, he survived.

I hope that the united tweeps of twitter would learn from that incident, but I can bet my boots that we haven’t learned, and it’ll still happen again.

It’s not that bad though, because we also have the comedy tribe who do everything in their power to create comic relief in this unstable country of violence and exciting drama. They somehow keep us together, and help us spread love through their amazing videos.

The activist tribe also do an amazing job and in their own way also remind us to spread love.

Well, if you’re going to be a citizen of this country, you have to stay sharp and remember not to over talk. Welcome to the united tweeps of twitter. You can sign up now and join the amazing tweeps of this app.

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